After the rain

Soccer camp this week (gave us the white t-shirts today but Anton not wearing his).  Love this Christian organization (Sports Quest)  that teaches character and the Gospel.   Ellie says "they tell us Mamma things"   It is nice to have reinforcement on rules for getting along well with others.

Nice thunder shower today and rainbow.

Trip to Fort Worth, April 2014

We had a great time seeing some family. Also went to the Perot Museum in Dallas (magnificent, but full of evolution lies), then to Skittle event from Gladney Adoptions. It was a great family time.

Brush you monkey's teeth everyday!

Bobbie needs $4K of work done.  Ellie is fine for now. 

Picasa creates these fun animations automatically...

God provides the love

Haven't had time to get the slide show of our "gotcha trip" and other pictures.  But had to post this.  One thing Chris and I have tried to explain to the girls is that God's love comes from above.  We don't have it in ourselves. That is why human relationships fail and there is pain.  This is why we don't love each other, and we fight with our siblings.  But with His love only from above we can love each other.

Ellie drew this picture today and at first I just thought it was a super star, and I noticed the happy house.  I didn't really understand her thoughts behind it.  But she pointed to the yellow line from the sky.  And she said it was how God gives us love but she was drawing something I've been trying to explain to them.  Yay!

I don't think we'd ever adopt if we didn't have faith in future grace.  We didn't even know these girls (or Anton) when we said "yes"to adopting them

I would encourage anyone who is thinking about adoption but not feeling the "love" to just ask yourself, do you have room in your heart and home?  If so, He can provide the grace, and all that includes, such as love in your heart, finances, material things, but most of all, you can point them to their Creator and this is what will make them happy forever.

Since we have had these girls home, we have heard stories and seen their pain, and to be used as an instrument of His grace brings us no greater joy.  They understand that everyone is a sinner, including mamma and pappa, but we're all growing in His grace, and all this is possible through Jesus Christ.

Woefully delinquent in posts.

I'm so behind in my blog, and I've been just too embarrassed to even think about it, and busy as you can imagine.  Things are going very well.  I've been Facebooking a lot of updates on our growth together as a family.  I'm am so behind in things that I never seem to catch up with my list but realizing that there are only so many hours in the day, and it's OK if it all doesn't get done.  

After we got back from Bulgaria, and Christmas, my Grandmother took a turn for the worst.  We made 3 trips to San Antonio to say good bye before she died.   She got to meet the girls, and they fell in love with her.  Bobbie will cry when she thinks about losing her grandmother.

But I'll post a video and some pics soon.

If you'd like to follow our adoption story on FB, please message me there.

Meanwhile, I've been getting spam posts to my blog.  So, not sure how to solve that problem.

Slideshow coming soon...

Day 4: Rainy Sunday with a sick girl. :(

I wake up every AM at 3 AM.  Bobbie came into room in tears.  She said she wasn't feeling good.  Then she ran to the bathroom and threw up.  She did this 3 more times.  We were going to join Ullriches at their church but God had different plans for us. 

Later on she felt better. We went out for pizza (the plan was for Bobbie to just eat white bread. But she wanted pizza and I thought it was OK).

Later on they showed me their Bulgarian dances.  There were some TV shows with Bulgarian musicians and these girls love to dance!

Then they helped themselves to some milk andvone must have been poured more and the fun evening turnrd into a big fight.  They threw milk and then grabbed the Kindle in defiance.  Then threw it down when I told her she had to love her sister and not punch her.

This was at bedtime and I was exhausted since uo at 3:00.  I was ready to ban them to their rooms and go to my room with my smartphone and let them cry it out.  But the other voice that said "feed my sheep" nudged me otherwise. I stroked their hair and one pulled out some cards from drawer (that they grabbed on first day...  I didn't give to any child specifically)  and I thought why not...  let's play Old Maid in bed.  They had never played.   They were so cute matching the cards they had 2 of.  They are animals and they were giving the Bulgarian names. 

Ok, stroke hair.  Rub backs and pray again.  Time for bed now.  I've been a fun and flexible.  kiss.  Bye bye.  time for sleep.  Wrong.  The little girls run to my bed.  if I thought I could sleep I'd allow it.  But also want to establish good habits for everyone's wellfare.  "No, Ellie and Bobbie sleep in your room" Break down again.   They did this last night but tonight it was taking it further,  now that they're feeling more secure.   Bobbie tells me Ellie cry.  I actually said "I don't care."  I knew it was manipulation but I also onow they have physical and emotional needs and need healing.  And I do too.  But we will find a way to give these girls what they need.

(While writing this  Ellie came into snuggle with me and got to hold her tight.  Then Bobbie came in.  Got Ellie a glass of water and then she found the Kindle. ..  fight.  Stomp on ground and I put Kindle away.)

Chris at this time is at airport in Houston waiting for flight.   I give him a call.  I've prepared him for what's about to come but I know it all has good ending and we'll have a great time.

Tomorrow is Monday (actually its Monday now here )  and we gave appointment at US Embassy and will see doctor.

Oh these girls take 2 baths a day and want to wash their hair everytime.  Note to self...  hide products that I don't thoroughly drained in 1 bath time

Day 3: more hugs, I love you's, and meltdowns

Wardrobe issues again today.  Ellie really likes these striped summer type leggings I brought.  They are pretty thin, not really warm enough.  Fashion is what matters.  They feel comfortable saying "no" to my face and the shake their finger at my as if scolding me, but they're not, just communicating with their hands, "no."

Ok, I didn't push the gloves and hats because the sun was out but I should have brought them because their little hands froze.  However my mistake taught them to bring them (they did make a point to grab them later in PM when we went out.)

Went to same park again.  Girls like to run away from Anton.  Scares me because they may not realize they're running in street.   Went to Starbucks again.  Girls start talking to this young student beside us.  She is junior in high school working on some map work homework.   Girls had a fight right there about an object one possessed and the other did not.  This young girl was so helpful in talking to them and calming them
down.

Had dinner tonight with lovely couple that works with orphans.   They were helpful in explaining that in orphanages, kids are very much out for themselves and mean to each other but they were also very encouraging about our girls. 

Tonight girls whined for me to sleep with them (threw themselves on the ground again).  At first I thought this is them wanting their own way and just tired (and probably true).  But I realized how much they need physical touch and closeness and so I layed down with them and stroked their hair until they went to sleep. 

Anton is very exhausted.   Has a cold sore.  He's having fun but he's inbetween being a crazy kid and seeking to be in that more responsible big brother role.  He's sensitive when I correct him, he had a breakdown when scolded for lack of self control.  I told him he was acting foolishly (and was hurting himself and girls because he was not thinking).  He said I called him a "fool" which I did not but he was being hard on himself more than I was.  Poor thing.  He fell asleep at dinner.   Begged to go to bed as soon as we got back to apt.

I feel very positive about the future and how these girls will grow in God's grace.  We prayed tonight and they prayed to God in Bulgarian.  We look forward in joining the Ullriches at church tomorrow assuming everyone is healthy.

Day 2: meltdowns, park, pizza and sweet friends to the rescue

I woke with 2 sweet faces giving me hugs saying, "I love you"  they are so happy.  But then trouble followed after breakfast.  We were getting ready for the park and they had a few meltdowns and fights.  Fists were flying,  tears, they tried to explain to me in Bulgarian.   All I could do was sing the Barney song I've been teaching them, "I love you."  I feel pretty inadequate.   I calledd our social worker and explained their reluctance to wear gloves and hats (they didn't think it was was fashionable.   She spoke to them on the phone and they said they would put on the gloves and hat.  But then they changed their minds.  I tried everything on the positive side but when  I got angry they were afraid to lose my affection and so the quickly discussed together and decided to comply.   I really don't want them to be afraid like that but we had to get out of the apartment for food as well as exercise.

So at the park, a few power struggles with Anton.  They didn't want to hold hands and be tethered.  

We had a break at Starbucks and the were very obedient. 

Then the wonderful and always gracious Ullriches showed up.  They found a pizza place with kids play area.  It was at bottom of big bldg in picture below.  Nice and warm place.  Then we had a few more fights and tears.  Scot and Robin were able to communicate with them.  And Scot prayed for the meal in Bulgarian.   They are just like all of us..  we're grateful then we're not.  But they're really still sweet girls all in all.

Gotcha day!

Thanksgiving Day.  We are so thankful.   Picked up our sweet and precocious girls. 

They are taking a bath now so I have a few seconds. 

Got passports started.   that is all we can do before the weekend.

They try to speak in Bulgarian to me.  I think they want me to find their favorite show on TV snd other things.  I just have to keep saying "I don't speak Bulgarian."  I have a translator app on my phone that helps a little.  

They are so happy.  They love the apartment.   They have been going through things and stowing things in their room (even things that aren't theirs :).  Bobbie found some nail polish, shut the door, and started polishing her nails (oh my).  But they really do want to please and have good manners overall.   I'm trying to get Anton to be more calming to them but he us just to excited. 

I'm not getting stressed out by the language situation.   I think that is God working to keep me even keeled thus far.

They call me "Mader"  mu-da. Screechy sound.  I told them to call me "mama"  Its pretty humorous.   I think one has to keep a sense of humor.

They started learning how to use the Kindle.  Bobbie is going to be good at computers because she'll try every button.  They are also going through DVDs and keep sampling.   It is like Christmas.   Now they're watching The Grinch (they're out of tub).  Better go.  Anton needs a towel.

"Mamo"  she just said.  she wants cookies.  I'm saying yes to everything practically except loud volume.

Ok. Bye.

Couldn't post above because Internet in apt not working.   At Starbucks now.   Had a few meltdowns.   But not a surprise.   I knew there would be tough moments.  Stil calling me "Mamo" 

In our cozy apartment in Sofia

The place is perfect!   Was able to get groceries using BG currency.   Apt. is nice central location downtown.  Our agency really wants to make sure we're happy. Just winding down now. 

In Munich about to board to Sofia

We're on our way

We made it to airpirt.  On our way to Newark NJ.  flight leaves at 11.  Then to Munich.  Then Sofia.  Get our girls Thanksgiving Day.  Chris is taking us as far as he could go today and will join us in a few days.

So much to be thankful for.  

Had to check my carry on.  I thought I bought the right size .  $100 fee.  Pooh.  Oh well.   deep breath.   De stress

A lot of folks love our girls

Some dear friends that I've known a long time had a shower/tea for me.  My friend who hosted it suggested I set up a registry.  This is a great idea, if I had time.   It was during the prep time for the garage sale, I could not think of a registry, in the midst of getting rid of stuff and room changes.   Generous folks were bringing things by for the garage sale and throwing in things particularly for the girls, the plan was to do inventory of outstanding needs after the garage sale (just before we travel almost).  But it turned out wonderful!  The Lord doesn't need me like I thought.  ha ha.  He has provided through such sweet friends that already love our girls.

But they have the greatest gifts in the world, they have a sovereign God, friends already outside our family who want to love them (as you can see).   They have a brother who is so excited he just jumps up and down.  and parents who are not quite as energetic as that, but ready to love them.  

We may not live in a castle, but they will be very rich.   My friends did an excellent job without a registry.  I don't think I could be more pleased.  I need to mention that one precious lady, just lost her son to cancer just a week or so prior.  She donated the cabbage patch dolls, and bag of things to go with them, that her girls used.  and was delighted to do it.  This was a precious gift because she has so many fond memories of her girls growing up with them.  But several ladies got together and showered me with all these things.  One of the things our girls asked for (and I was glad they felt free to do so) was a baby and stroller.  So many other things were given, to many to mention.  Let's just say we got showered with many blessings.

Room is ready!

It took a lot to get to this point but room is done.  This is one of the hardest things I think I've ever done, or ranks in the top 3. So, today I'm feeling a big sigh of relief.  This has been a consuming project that a lot of other pursuits on hold.  Today is a good day for me.   Here is what has had to take place over the past 2 1/2 months.

First we had to move Chris' study into our bedroom.  That was a huge deal, had to get new furniture to make it work.  Chris, being a former pastor and still loves to study the Bible, has a ton of books  And we had to build this new furniture.  (got IKEA).  So, if we're going to do all that, might as well paint our bedroom walls since they haven't been painted in over 12 years (and that took a while to make a decision on the right color).  I'm glad I did paint, but it was more work than I thought it would be, I painted it all myself.  I was worn out at that point.

Meanwhile, we get offsite storage, start putting stuff there that we want to sell.  And as I started to get closer to the garage sale, I began to move more things there that we want to keep in storage from the study because we can't sell and don't know where to put it.

Then we had big garage sale to sell all our used furniture, some we just gave away because we had it so long.  At the garage sale, we accepted donations from other families of their things to sell.  People were so generous.  So many people gave and we were able to raise a lot of money to help pay for the home changes we did.   But we had a lot of "stuff" at our house.  A lot of stuff.   Really, a lot of stuff.

Then, what to do with the leftover stuff, that took a week of trying to figure out and our house is a total wreck, but I begin to slowly get the girl's room done.  This time, paid for a painter  (smart!!).  But I had to paint the bunk beds white, of course.  Why not?  Let's do it the way we want it.  and I'm starting to feel stronger anyway from all this.

And then we get one more piece of IKEA furniture.  Chris builds it for me.   OK, wash the linens.  (I think putting sheets on a bunk bed is almost equivalent to a pilates class.)

But it's done!!  And guess what, I'm almost packed.  And the house is clean.  I'm a happy momma today.

Some of this, I know I brought it upon myself wanting thins "just so."  but I can say now, I'm glad it's all done the best way I possibly could do it.  I hope our girls feel loved.  And I think Chris is happy with his new study.  I like having his study in our bedroom, actually.

Chris says they should feel like princesses with their new room.

You can see many of the generous gifts from so many people.  I just realized I forgot to post about the shower some dear friends had for me.